A day in the life...

Lucy turned 1 a couple of weeks ago. I've been meaning to write about the experience. Actually that last sentence pretty much sums up the past 6 weeks of my life "I've been meaning to write about that". Oh well. Here is a day in the life of Lucy.

7ish in the morning:
Wake up (for the third or fourth time since going to sleep) and talk to the aquarium in the pack-n-play. When mom comes in excitedly dive into your blankets, then get up as quick as you can to show her how you can turn the light in the aquarium on and off. Ask to be picked up.

During diaper change lay perfectly still and babble angelically...until the diaper is completely off, then immediately flip over and make for the edge of the bed as quickly as possible. Stopping just short of falling to sit and flash mom a huge smile as you wait for her to pull you back to the blanket for a new diaper.

Play with mom's hair and hum while you gulp the liquid portion of breakfast as quickly as possible.

8ish in the morning:
Get out to the rest of the house and get excited about seeing anyone else who is home.

Head straight to the back door and BEG to be let outside (through pointing, clapping, grunting, and trying to reach the door handle)...you may even sign 'please', 'more', 'help', and blow kisses if REALLY desperate.

On a nice day go out on the back porch for second breakfast. Announce (non-verbally) that you want to sit in the stroller and eat off its tray.  Unless you decide you'd rather stand, in which case would mom please put your breakfast on the footrest of the stroller where you can reach it. Refuse to injest anything but cheerios, puffs, and pieces of wood or acorns.

Make mom smile by dancing to the sound of a bird singing. Watch the deer in the backyard.

Get in and out of your little red car. Several times. Want to be pushed in the little red car. Sing the whole time the car is moving...except when honking the horn, turning the key or pushing the lever.

Walk all over the porch. Practice sitting to go down steps. Go down all the steps you can find. Repeat (going up as necessary). Try to cross gravel barefoot. Decide that's not a good idea. Spread some gravel on the steps. Decide that doesn't look too good and quuickly brush it all off. Go find a big rock. Taste it. Bang it on the ground...take it to the chair and bang it on that. Throw it. See an ant. Try to squash it with your finger. Get taken away from the ants by mom. Scream about that.

10ish in the morning:
Go inside (with much wailing and writhing in protest) because after 2 hours mom is getting tired of playing on the back porch (a rather risky location requiring constant supervision).

Take some letters off the refrigerator and put them in the plant by the door. Go in the pantry and try to bite into the coffee containers. See the microwave (which is at eye level) and try to get the door open. Move some shoes around.

Protest when mom announces that it is naptime. Fuss half-heartedly all the way up the stairs  while rubbing eyes and burying face in blanket.

11ish: Fall asleep with hand tangled in mom's hair...or be put in bed to scream for a minute and a half...followed by half an hour of talking before keeling over unconscious.

12ish: Wake up and repeat morning diaper routine. Have lunch. If you are eating out make sure mom orders some form of soup and bread because those are your favorites and pretty much the only thing you will eat...besides puffs and cheerios.

1ish: Go to the park. Go down the slide a lot. Be nervous at first, but after 5 or 6 rides suddenly become very brave. Try to climb up the slide...for 10 minutes at a time (you are very determined) or until mom makes you stop.

Follow other children around and talk to them. Be doted on by 7 year old girls. Try to steal other toddlers' sippy cups and strollers. Charm other moms into sharing their child's puffs with you. Ride the dolphin. Ride the motorcycle. Ride the dolphin again. Chase birds without realizing you are walking/running without anyone's assistance. When you do realize it, immediately crouch down while you decide if it's worth the risk to keep chasing or if you should wave your arms for someone to come rescue you. It's usually more fun to keep going after the birds. Try to immitate all the bad behavior you see. Ignore your sippy cup and instead drink out of Gannan's HUGE cup and straw. Get mad when she finally takes it back. Refuse to wear a hat for more than 5 seconds.

3ish: Go home. Drink all 8 oz of the water in your sippy cup and eat a cracker on the way. Give a passionate speech to your reflection in the monkey-mirror. Fuss. Throw cup over side of carseat. Throw remains of cracker over side of carseat. Fuss. 

 Refuse to take an afternoon nap. After 45 minutes of screaming, fussing, talking, singing, talking, hollering, and playing get really excited when mom comes in exasperated. Play nicely with all the toys that make noise or can be shredded (like your own personal magazine). Bring mom books to read. Practice signing 'more' and turning pages. Identify curious George. Decide you are ready to go back outside to play on the back porch for a while. Repeat morning back porch routine until dinner time.

5ish: Realize you are STARVING to death but do NOT want ANYTHING solid. Or anything out of a cup. Unless it's a chocolate milkshake because you're pretty sure you tried one of those once and it was amazing. Except for the fact that it was cold.

6ish: Dinner. At the end of the prayer throw your hands up in the air for the 'Amen!'. Discover that you have hair on your head. Feel that for a few minutes. Smash all your food with your finger. If you can't poke a hole in it, it's not worth tasting. Want what's on everyone else's plate...until it touches your tray.

Drop foods you don't want over the side for the dog...except there is no dog. Eat some puffs and cheerios...and maybe a yogurt melt or two. Wave around a fork with a piece of melon on it. Slurp on the melon for a few minutes. Drop fork over the side. When the conversation gets boring squint your eyes at people and pretend to laugh. this usually makes them start laughing. Then they make faces at you. And funny noises.  Dinner is much more entertaining when they do that. Decide you have had enough of this and attempt to sweep the remaining food off your tray and onto the floor. Sign "finished". Get down and go on a scavenger hunt for lost food. Eat anything you find on the floor.

7ish: Bedtime. Want mom to be the one to hold you ALL day. Until she says it's bedtime. Then you want Da. Or Gannan. Or Bucket. Or anyone else who happens to be there and might be able to save you from Jammies. Fuss over getting ready for bed. You didn't have an afternoon nap after all. Fall asleep after nursing for 5 minutes.

8ish: Wake up because you are still hungry. Eat for another 20 minutes and go back to bed. Participate in some mild protest but give it up pretty quickly. Your blankets are nice and soft as it turns out.

Today

Today Lucy crawled on her hands and knees for the first time. She's been army crawling for a month, and after dozens of attempts she finally managed to coordinate her hands and knees without involving her tummy. She went 3 steps (steps? crawls? Scootches?).

Today I alternated running and walking for 30 minutes. It was quite difficult, but not really as close to the near-death experience as I thought it would be. I think my goal of just running for 30 minutes is actually attainable after all. (like my alliteration there?)

Today Jason experienced his first full day of boot camp...in Texas...in late June. I have never prayed so much for  one person in one day in my life.

Today Lucy decided that every item in the house (movable or immovable) is there for the sole purpose of helping her stand up and she should try them all. To that end she attempted pulling herself up with the help of a rolling chair, the corner of the dresser, the rocking recliner, the half-empty diaper box, the computer monitor, and the dog. I'm torn between feeling guilty and feeling relieved that she (only) fell and hit her head on the floor twice (once was carpet). Both times she recovered in under a minute so I think it was scary more than anything.

Today I went the whole day without eating processed sugar. I had a killer headache. I don't know if the two things were related.

Today Jason might be able to call me with his address so I can start sending him letters. I hope so. He's only been gone 34 hours but I hate not being able to encourage him in any way.

Today I decided that if we make it to the end of Sept. without any trips to the doctor (other than check-ups) we will be doing awesome. I discovered that Lucy is growing up in jumps not in steps so I need to expect the unbelievable. And I doubted she would try to walk before Jason graduated....but now I'm not so sure.

Today was a big day. And it was only the second one.

First trip without Da!

Lucy and I have officially made our first trip without Jason. I'm sure there will be many more to come, but the first one is always a bit of an adventure. We haven't gone too far - we are in Charlotte hanging out for a few days while Jason fills the house with toxic fumes while re-finishing our bathtub. The trip usually takes about 3 1/2 hours...or 4 if there's any traffic at all. It took Lucy and I 4 hours and 45 minutes, which isn't too horrible. It was a little adventurous.
- Lucy started out like a champ, sleeping the first hour and a half!
- I had to figure out how to use a public restroom that had no place to put a baby (since we are no longer using the removable car seat)
- We drove through a rainstorm that had me using the windshield wipers on high and driving 40 mph...and still BARELY being able to see the lines on the road right in front of me
- Lucy decided during just about the only 20-30 mile stretch of NO WHERE to stop that she was done being in the car and started to fuss, then cry, then scream until we finally saw a McDonalds to stop at
- After all that exertion, Lucy went to sleep about 20 minutes after leaving McDonalds and slept the rest of the way!

We made it! Fun with friends to follow =) ....and in a few days, the trip back!

A Picture of Parenthood

I've been meaning to write about Lucy's Valentine's Day painting for a while  now, but kept getting distracted by other stuff...so here it is: A picture of parenthood in one painting.

On Valentine's Day Lucy was 3 months and 3 weeks old. I decided that a painting by Lucy would be a great present for Jason. Conveniently for us, Valentine's was on a weekday so he was at work, leaving Lu and I free to shop for supplies and do some art. Since it was going to be her first painting I wanted it to last forever so I got an 8"x10" canvas board and some acrylic paint (which I did manage to keep out of her mouth but not off our legs and clothes).

I had a brilliant idea for a picture.
                                                           I thought...

We got green paint so I could paint Lucy's toes and do little toe prints across the bottom of the picture for grass. Then I would fingerpaint a stem and use 2 little Lucy-footprints for leaves.

We got orange paint so I could let her dip her hands in it and (with my help and guidance) make a circle of handprints at the top of the stem for a beautiful orange flower. ...we might even mix in a little yellow to make it even prettier!

Of course we got yellow paint because what is a picture of a flower without the sun shining down on it? Some nice yellow handprints radiating from the top corner of the picture should do nicely....

It didn't turn out how I planned. I gave her the tools, but the picture is all hers (well, I did fingerpaint the writing for her).

She looks pretty proud of herself and I guess this is a pretty good illustration of how life is as a parent. You can make plans but in the end....well, you know!

Mirrors (repost)

Last year I spent a lot of time looking at myself in mirrors, staring at my growing belly in awe and trying to see if it was moving; if it was lopsided, if it had any odd lumps, anything that would point to the fact that I really was growing a real live person in there. In the last 4 months, I have spent very little time looking at myself in mirrors. There's the quick glance in the morning to see if my hair is looking ridiculous before throwing it into a half-ponytail, bandanna, hat, or some other quick-fix, and there's the part before I change Lucy's diaper where I hold her up to the mirror over the changing table so she can look at herself and me before smiling and burying her face in my neck (not sure why...maybe mirrors make her nose itch).

It distresses me to look any more than that. All I can see are the imperfections, especially the tummy that is still very soft and round, and the hair that I have yet to figure out how to style...even after 26 years of having it! I don't like conventional mirrors. 

My favorite mirrors are much better than those shiny glass things. I see myself in my baby girl, which is funny because I don't think she looks like me. When I go in to get her in the morning and her face lights up, I feel beautiful because I see her joy. When I'm in bed at night and realize my hand is over my eyes or feel some other expression on my face, I don't picture my face but hers, because she does the same things. When Lucy and I are in the bathroom, I don't notice any of my own imperfections because my eyes are focused on her reflection and to me she is perfect.

Lucy is a great mirror. But the best mirror is my husband. He's the one who makes me feel truly beautiful. If I had never seen an image of myself and had only him as my reflection I would think I must be a super-model. He's the one who whistled at me when I was nine months pregnant and felt HUGE, who comes into the kitchen and wraps his arms around me so I am overwhelmed with his love, who looks at me like I'm the most beautiful thing he's ever seen and he couldn't bear to lose me. My husband transforms the way I see myself until I think 'who needs those shiny things anyway'. I love him for that and a million other things. 

Still...although mirrors are overrated and Jason loves me the way I am, I want to be the best I can be for my family and that means staying (or getting) healthy and fit. So. New Year's Resolution that I made this week: lose the rest of the baby weight (maybe 30 lbs...optimistically), get in shape by my 30th birthday (July 1st) (aka: be able to run at least 2 miles without dying, do a couple of pull-ups and generally not feel like I'm 50 and falling apart), and read the whole Bible by January(actually Jason and I are doing this together and we're off to a good start - 8 days so far without falling off the wagon!). We may love each other for who we are and be happy with ourselves, but I think we should always strive for excellence.

In the last few months how I look has become a little less important, and being able to take care of and have fun with my family has become more important... so here's to 2011, finding balance in life, growing closer to God, and seeing my reflection in the greatest mirrors on earth every day.

Memories

There are few things more wonderful than looking down at the perfectly content face of the baby girl who thinks you are the whole world and who does not want to be anywhere else but in your arms. I spend a lot of time looking at that face...she is a very extensive eater. The other day as I stared at her I thought how sad it was that she will retain no memory of time that I will cherish forever. I suppose the important part is that she will grow up with my love imprinted on her. Still, I thought, it's almost tragic.

Then I imagined my own mother doing the same for me. Something I have had no memory of up to this point. At that moment, I felt like I was transported back in time. Suddenly, I could see my mom sitting in a rocking chair holding me. I could see that same expression of contentment on my face. It was as if I was looking through her eyes, feeling what she must have felt 29 years ago. I don't have any memories of my infancy, but in becoming a mother myself I can share in the memories of my mom and everything takes on much more meaning.

Gazing into Lucy's eyes I wonder if someday she will have a daughter of her own and 'remember' the joy of this moment with me.